Who smells worse????

This story has so many holes, Noel wouldn’t fuck it.

A grown man man doesn’t need more than 5 minutes to shower. What takes you so long that you didn’t have time to shower before going to see this girl? Did you have to shave your pussy?

And you are so fucking interesting this girl really couldn’t wait an extra 5-10 minutes to see you? Are your Mr Yo stories that goddamn important?

how fucking disgusting is this girl that she is going to let you into her bed when you haven’t showered or used soap in weeks? She must be a fucking pig.

my stories are important fyi.

What kind of a man takes 5 minutes to shower? I'm more like 3.

She's impatient. I don't take that long. Tho my brothers have the same complaint about me. I'm thorough. I don't like forgetting to bring stuff. I'll b about to leave n then think of something I'm forgetting. That typically happens numerous thymes whenever I go out. It's an especially big cunt cos I live in a fourth floor apartment n often when I'm going somewhere I'll do like 3 trips back up n down the stairs to grab shit I forgot.

And Art, fuck off with ur bitter shit insulting her. What possible reason do u have to insult her like that, u miserable, bitter cunt? What r u upset about? U're getting way too bitter to b questioning MY level of mental health.

Ask Mister Yo what she looks like. He's seen pictures of her. It'd b fucking hilarious if I posted those pictures here, which I would NEVER do. U'd b crying urself to sleep every night trying to tell convince urself this is all lies.

I find it funny that people here question my integrity n think I would actually consider lying about something to try n impress some fucking dipshits on an internet forum.

The funniest part is wtf is remotely impressive about this story that I would actually bother making it up?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by noel411

What kind of a man takes 5 minutes to shower? I'm more like 3.

She's impatient. I don't take that long. Tho my brothers have the same complaint about me. I'm thorough. I don't like forgetting to bring stuff. I'll b about to leave n then think of something I'm forgetting. That typically happens numerous thymes whenever I go out. It's an especially big cunt cos I live in a fourth floor apartment n often when I'm going somewhere I'll do like 3 trips back up n down the stairs to grab shit I forgot.

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This sounds like OCD.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by noel411

Ask Mister Yo what she looks like. He's seen pictures of her. It'd b fucking hilarious if I posted those pictures here, which I would NEVER do. U'd b crying urself to sleep every night trying to tell convince urself this is all lies.

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I promise you that if you post a picture of a hot chick who won't fuck you because you are a smelly dirtbag, I will 100% believe you.

Lolz, if u wanna talk about my ocd that's a whole new thread, bwoy.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by noel411

I find it funny that people here question my integrity n think I would actually consider lying about something to try n impress some fucking dipshits on an internet forum.

The funniest part is wtf is remotely impressive about this story that I would actually bother making it up?

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You’re the one who constantly claims to just be “taking the piss” and it’s all some big joke.

It’s like I said. You’re In depth posts are VERY SERIOUS, and your just a sensitive, obsessive compulsive person.

You don’t like people or claim not to, because you desperately want their admiration and when you don’t get it, you withdraw.

If this girl is indeed that hot, and you are too afraid to fuck her, then it only reaffirms everything.

You’re putting the pussy on a pedestal bro.

Take a shower, and go put your ball stank on this bitch.

Yeah my in depth posts r serious. But my commentary on shit is usually at least half taking the piss.

It's def not a case of putting the pussy on a pedestal. It's just over thinking the whole situation. It's a curse. No doubt about it.

At this point I kinda regret not trying to make it happen. I think if the situation arises again n I think it's on, I might approach things differently.

Thyme will tell.

And wtf is up with Italians? Everyone here takes the piss n gives me shit, n rightly so. I wouldn't expect or accept any less. But u 2 cunts seem downright bitter n resentful about my life, n like u genuinely wanna bring me down.

What's up with that?

Noel, I'll go first. Here's a picture of a hot chick who won't fuck me.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikiped...cropped%29.jpg

Now don't cry yourself to sleep.

Noel, if you don't feel yourself worthy of a bath, you're probably not fucking because you don't think you deserve the pusheh. Also, you must really hate her if you want to pull out your oniony yellowing rancid dick and give her a violent yeast infection while kebab sweat pours from your balding scalp and armpits onto her half suicidal face. Just smudging her numb vagina with a porn deflated flaccid garlic dick like a smegma drenched fly beating fruitlessly into a window.

^proper fuc'n HARD lolz were had

Second thyme 'round still hard lolz persisted.

Best post I've seen in a long thyme.

why is noel eating garlic on a stick?

^fuc'n lolz. That was my fave part too.

The second best part was ' your oniony yellowing rancid dick'.

I'm still having proper lolz when I Amy Reid it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by SonicRingz

I think TSA won this thread's 'creative writing award' with this line:



He should get into erotic freelance writing for dudes who won't bathe unless a piss-taking father figure screams at them

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https://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram...ninstagram.com

lol at Amy Reid it and Tide Pod hue

That is straight Literotica material right there.

Noel, how often do you do laundry? Do you wear the same clothes for weeks at a time also? Do you have the same disdain for laundry soap as you do for bath soap and only rinse your clothes in water?

I do laundry once a week. With washing powder n fabric softener. I don't really wear clothes that much. At home I only wear boxers most the thyme. New pair every day. Then I'll wear the same singlet n shorts every morning when I go for my bike ride/walk. Wash them once a week. The singlets get fuc'n filthy n disgusting in summer. Pretty funny when I stop at the supermarket on the way home.

This thyme of year I surf most every morning tho. As long as there's some kind of waves. Just getting back into that habit now. In those cases I just wear the shorts I surf in for the ride over to the beach, n then some other ones for the ride home.

I wear a different shirt at work for each shift. Same shorts. The shorts really don't get dirty. Was 'em once a week.

It's so rare for me to go out anywhere where I need to dress, other than work, that when I pull out a decent singlet or shirt, or shorts, I'll often wear em that one thyme n b like well fuck, I'm not gonna wash them just for that (unless they do get a little sweaty or whatever), n then they sit around for weeks, even months waiting to get worn again.

That's all pretty pedestrian, I think. Sorry to disappoint. U asked.

When it gets really hot, n my singlets I ride/walk in get really sweat soaked, I'll pull out a new one before laundry day if I have to.

You don't shower, wear 1 pair of shorts at home for 7 days. The same shorts you ride your bike with. lol, you're bugged out

Nah sun I don't wear shorts at home. Just boxers. Different pair each day. I wear one pair of shorts on my rides/walks, n another pair at work. If I go anywhere else I'll wear another pair.

I don't think my laundry habits r bad at all, but then I don't think my washing habits r bad at all when I'm at home either.

I think u might all just b a bunch of pansies.

Nah sun I don't wear shorts at home. Just boxers. Different pair each day. I wear one pair of shorts on my rides/walks, n another pair at work. If I go anywhere else I'll wear another pair.

I don't think my laundry habits r bad at all, but then I don't think my washing habits r bad at all when I'm at home either.

I think u might all just b a bunch of pansies.

ok, miss read your post. Anyways, do you.

is a singlet a type of bra?

I’m thinking about gettin me a singlet for the days I mow the lawn.

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So I'm just wondering Noel, if this girl really needed to see you so soon, and you needed to take a shower and didn't have time to because you HAD to see her ASAP, why didn't you have her come to your place and while she was in route, you could have taken a shower?

Do you have a place? Or are you homeless? Still live with your parents? What's the deal?

Cos she was drunk. She called me at 10:30pm or some shit. That's y I couldn't lag too.

BTW I didn't actually consider having a shower, I don't think. Just saying I wouldn't have had thyme anyway.

She told me yesterday that she thinks about having sex with me a lot. So we'll c what happens from here.

Damn you rejected her on a booty call.

You better bang this girl soon before she starts to resent or think your gay.

^lolz, yeah TSA shut this shit down with that post.

6 pages in no thyme tho. I must b a fascinating guy. That's y all the girls wanna cuddle with me, lolz. Even when I stink of kebab.

I've been dating the girl from the kebab story for the last month. The other day I was in bed with her, n I was a bit sweaty, n I apologised if I smelled bad. She told me I didn't n that I never did. That I never really give off any odour at all, lolz.

I never eat kebabs before/when I c her, lolz.

Awwww. Thatz sweet.

Imagine being in bed with a chick and instead of being happy you’re in bed with a chick, you’re happy to prove a bunch of loser men on wu-Corp they were wrong about your body odor.

Hahaha.

I pay hookers at the red light district to sniff me out and confirm me I'm still fresh.