RockD vs B.a.r.n. (b.A.R.n. Advances)

[Visionz]

Comp votes only. Both verses must be done by Weds. RockD drops first

[RockD]

B.a.r.n i will subdue, as i run up in his corral
as soon as he saw D i plummet his morale
I’ll give ya a decal go park in the losers spot
Farm boy this is rap to yo I’m cream of the crop
don’t get bucked boy you a squish toy, soft nigga don’t contest
u wanna be Al Capone but I’m Elliot Ness
get blessed n wrecked by the mic that I hold
I don’t care what barn stands for u still get fucked like a whore
I’m carnivore eaten your soul raw
get destroyed lyrically or by the mandible claw
I’m not Allah never blaspheme but I’m the soul gener-all
fagg nigga don’t fuck wit rock cause I’m str8 hetero
tell yo peps to bet it all, u lost now u stranded
go up in ya barn fuck u up, n like a cow get branded
u thought it was safe so it sounded, u came out at the wrong time
thought u were growin oranges but is sour like the lime
I’m the famine of the time u aint sick u just dead
u aint waltzin thru this brick wall cause RockD is tuff as lead
So instead take a hike don’t respond go plant some seed
Cause after killing u I want what u breed

[b.a.R.n.]

i drop english vocab distastefully, gracefully
with a joint and my pen on my hip im in the place to be
reppin amsterdam brutality, faithfully
yeah, i got dead bodies covered with hay in my b.a.R.n.
loud fuckers like you get their lips sown with yarn
and i got cholesteral, i eat emcees remains fried
i bury rockd at the beach and watch him drown at tide
dissing me is a mistake, this verse will take your life away
you body decayed inside a lake, your neck broken down to your spinal blade
whos next, i wonder as i smash and crash
how many rounds is rockd gonna last?
not one, rockd is done, i had fun
doing him, booing him, screwing him and chewing him
my shit speaks for itself, that means its alive
it sais fuck with b.a.R.n and he'll murder you to survive
your face pushed in the dirt, cant look in my direction
you define pure trash, i personify perfection
this little faggot tried to diss me, but fuck it
i got duckets, today the little faggot kicks the bucket

[Robert]

I think RockD got this. I mean B.a.r.n laid down a nice verse but I felt the first 6 to 8 lines had no punches whereas RockD came with punches from the very start (good verse).
Vote=RockD
peace

[TeknicelStylez]

Honestly I thought this was the worst battle of the first round so far.

Vote = b.a.r.n

[RockD]

Honestly I thought this was the worst battle of the first round so far.

Vote = b.a.r.n

^^^ hey unseen, if u think that is a fair vote correct me but he just hatin on both of us mc's, he has no subtance in his stament *cough* just like his rhymes, punk bitch i hope u n I make the semis faggot... even though he dint vote for me he dint even give credit to the person he voted for , what makes his verse so good that he deserves yo vote "dip shit" explain , atleast i have the common curtesy of explaining my vote . dont go dissin "US" just vote and critic is only right if my verse was that bad point it out and point out wat was good about B.a.r.n.'s dont just come wit weak shit like that.

[TeknicelStylez]

True that was foul, I'm just lazy, and he said we don't gotta explain our votes if we don't want to. It's not like I did them randomly.

Lay off on the adjectives I'll give you an explanation.

What happened to asking nicely lol.

[RockD]

^^^ man i felt u offended me and b.a.r.n, i respect you but i ask that u respect me. how can u call our battle the worst whent t-ribe's oponent hasnt even showed yet. for all we know phenix can say some real corny shit atlest wait till the rnd is ova lol... but yea , go ahead n do yo thing. and i agree i lost my cool but i can see you understand were i'm comin from so i hope "We" dont have this misunderstanding again , including me loosin my cool.

[MASTER PAI MEI]

Tek do the right thing place a vote and back up your vote with an explination or quotes from the verses you liked or disliked...Thanks

[TeknicelStylez]

B.a.r.n i will subdue, as i run up in his corral
as soon as he saw D i plummet his morale
Not bad but you gotta understand your rhyme schemes need to be complex, try to focus on rhyming mutliple words, because most single worded rhymes are unoriginal.
I’ll give ya a decal go park in the losers spot
Farm boy this is rap to yo I’m cream of the crop
The first line was good for a laugh, the next one is eh... farm boy I'm the cream of the crop, just doesn't sound like something you would wanna say in a battle, once again single word rhyme
don’t get bucked boy you a squish toy, soft nigga don’t contest
u wanna be Al Capone but I’m Elliot Ness
Ok peep the bar structure here, your throwing your flow off point by starting with one set of rhymes, wich once again is very simple if you break it down, your rhyming "Boy" with "Toy", if the words before them rhymed it would of been complex but it's simplistic, than you proceed to rhyming something else. I see the squish toy/soft nigga word play but thats not enough to compensate for throwing your flow off.
get blessed n wrecked by the mic that I hold
I don’t care what barn stands for u still get fucked like a whore
OK these lines didn't even rhyme properly.... and they didn't state anything either.
I’m carnivore eaten your soul raw
get destroyed lyrically or by the mandible claw
Once again single rhyme scemes, you see what I'm getting at? When you break it down it's just mundane, think about it raw and claw, and what are you saying, carnivores are meat eaters, souls are made of meat? and mandible claw? How many people are destroyed by a sock stretching your jaw bones? It might hurt a little bit but I think I missed the finality of it all,
I’m not Allah never blaspheme but I’m the soul gener-all
fagg nigga don’t fuck wit rock cause I’m str8 hetero
Nice use of word play in the second line. The first line, what are you trying to get at?
tell yo peps to bet it all, u lost now u stranded
go up in ya barn fuck u up, n like a cow get branded
Once again..... (see a pattern here?) bland use off unoriginal single word rhyme schemes, I can't stress to you the importance of multi's, plus getting branded like a cow... like that doesn't even hurt someones feelings, you gotta aim personal, try to crack on the person, don't just try to talk about how your gonna injure them in all these different ways especially if your gonna do it with boring rhyme scemes.
u thought it was safe so it sounded, u came out at the wrong time
thought u were growin oranges but is sour like the lime
OK now listen carefully, read that second line out loud to yourself like 10 times, is that something you would say in a nationally televised battle? IMO that line is just horrible, like one of the worst I read all day. IT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE!
I’m the famine of the time u aint sick u just dead
u aint waltzin thru this brick wall cause RockD is tuff as lead
Famine = starving, what does that have to do with pestilence and death. When I hear famine I picture a bunch of ethiopians starving, and how does one exactly personify famine? once again boring rhyme scheme, poorly composed line.
So instead take a hike don’t respond go plant some seed
Cause after killing u I want what u breed
Ok... so you don't want him to battle you, you want him to go have sex with women and bust in them so that you can go kill his babies when they are born... does this require an explanation?


i drop english vocab distastefully, gracefully
with a joint and my pen on my hip im in the place to be
reppin amsterdam brutality, faithfully
Listen to the smoothness of barns flow equipped with multi's, the verse is down hill from here.
yeah, i got dead bodies covered with hay in my b.a.R.n.
loud fuckers like you get their lips sown with yarn
and i got cholesteral, i eat emcees remains fried
i bury rockd at the beach and watch him drown at tide
Once again just "I'ma kill him this way, I'ma kill him that way" lines
dissing me is a mistake, this verse will take your life away
you body decayed inside a lake, your neck broken down to your spinal blade
Some more multiple rhyme schemes
whos next, i wonder as i smash and crash
how many rounds is rockd gonna last?
not one, rockd is done, i had fun
A little simplistic, but none the less still multi's and more interesting than single worded rhyme schemes.
doing him, booing him, screwing him and chewing him
This I don't understand, your gonna be screwing him?.... cmon man...
my shit speaks for itself, that means its alive
it sais fuck with b.a.R.n and he'll murder you to survive
This is kinda original, listen to the first line, he's personifying his lyrics, too bad the rhyme scheme is simple.
your face pushed in the dirt, cant look in my direction
you define pure trash, i personify perfection
this little faggot tried to diss me, but fuck it
i got duckets, today the little faggot kicks the bucket
I can't knock him for good use of multi's even though his verse is simple he got you there.

Heres the deal rockD, If your gonna use simplistic rhyme scemes you gotta make your lines more complex to cover that, same thing vice versa if your gonna write simplistic lines, you can flex your use of multi's to still please the crowd and cover your ass. You see what I'm getting at? If you throw an ill ass punchline nobody's gonna hate on you for using a single word rhyme scheme, but if you say something like

tell yo peps to bet it all, u lost now u stranded
go up in ya barn fuck u up, n like a cow get branded

It's gonna get boring quick... you know what I'm saying? Everyone thinks I'm hating on them, I'm not hating on you, I just know how shits done, I know the format of battles and what they are supposed to be like. I'm not saying I'm good I'm really not, but theres websites out there where people are like on some professional text battle tip, and this is how their verses are structured.

Complex rhymes schemes, meaning multiple words rhymed.
Word Play, metaphors, similes = punches, imagery.
Flow, Bar structure, rhythm...

All important ass elements, that alot of people here take for granted.

Since both your verses were simplistic as far as wordplay and a lack of punches, you left me with no choice but to vote based on a different category, Flow, and based on that I came to the person whose verse flowed better and he had multi's.

Vote = b.a.r.n

You happy now?

[TeknicelStylez]

^^^ man i felt u offended me and b.a.r.n, i respect you but i ask that u respect me. how can u call our battle the worst whent t-ribe's oponent hasnt even showed yet. for all we know phenix can say some real corny shit atlest wait till the rnd is ova lol... but yea , go ahead n do yo thing. and i agree i lost my cool but i can see you understand were i'm comin from so i hope "We" dont have this misunderstanding again , including me loosin my cool.

Thats why I said so far, and you took it out of context, thats not necessarily a bad thing, being that most the battles SO FAR have been pretty good, it's not bad to be the worst out of the best na mean.

[PHENIX]

Both was nice but I gotta go wit RockD. He killed b.a.r.n. wit his last bar when he said after killin you I want what u breed. That was the dagger.

Vote=rockd

[MASTER PAI MEI]

Nice Vote..

[$inista]

vote RockD
felt his verse had more sbstance & better punches

[Potent1]

I think the emcees were matched ..


but rockd last line kinda fizzled and B.a.r.n still had his lungs....


v=B.a.r.n