striving for something u cant have

[Baby Face Nelson]

i found that memories kept me from falling of the rails after ma sleep/nutrient deprivation.
memories of the feelings i had for a queen helped me stay strong. i didnt need olanzapine..i took anyway. all it did was make me sleepy. doctors said i need that shit for a year but im already of that. my own choice.

but yeah i just wanted to say that i think meditating on something that means alot to u can be a good technique for bettering urself. i aint saying anything new its just i found it to be apparent

[LORD NOSE]

it becomes scary because you later realize that the things you wanted 15 to 20 years ago, isn't really what you should have had, and if you were to get what you wanted back then, it most likely would have damaged you -

i'm realizing that wanting less and needing less keeps the weight off of your mind and body -

desires that seem good like love and attention, acception and so forth, are not all that innocent and can lead to your demise - a desire is a desire - it's like an attractive fire that draws you to it - you spend Time getting to it - you get it - and realize that it was a waste of time spent that could have been spent on you locating your problems and solving them.

[Baby Face Nelson]

it becomes scary because you later realize that the things you wanted 15 to 20 years ago, isn't really what you should have had, and if you were to get what you wanted back then, it most likely would have damaged you -

i'm realizing that wanting less and needing less keeps the weight off of your mind and body -

desires that seem good like love and attention, acception and so forth, are not all that innocent and can lead to your demise - a desire is a desire - it's like an attractive fire that draws you to it - you spend Time getting to it - you get it - and realize that it was a waste of time spent that could have been spent on you locating your problems and solving them.

thats real talk! its the feelings generated from that fiasco that stays fresh...its an inspiration though trust me...it may sound weird but it really is. i hear u though actually attaining her would have dimmed things down alot

[Baby Face Nelson]

desires that seem good like love and attention, acception and so forth, are not all that innocent and can lead to your demise - a desire is a desire - it's like an attractive fire that draws you to it - you spend Time getting to it - you get it - and realize that it was a waste of time spent that could have been spent on you locating your problems and solving them.

i can def testify to that..so true. its happend in the past to me

[IrOnMaN]

it becomes scary because you later realize that the things you wanted 15 to 20 years ago, isn't really what you should have had, and if you were to get what you wanted back then, it most likely would have damaged you -

i'm realizing that wanting less and needing less keeps the weight off of your mind and body -

desires that seem good like love and attention, acception and so forth, are not all that innocent and can lead to your demise - a desire is a desire - it's like an attractive fire that draws you to it - you spend Time getting to it - you get it - and realize that it was a waste of time spent that could have been spent on you locating your problems and solving them.

You're right but isn't this what life's all about? You can't gain experience if you don't live and experience life. That's the point. It's all a gamble. Some people win, some win big and most people lose. The sad thing is some people don't strive to become who they want to be v/s who they need to be.

[LORD NOSE]

You're right but isn't this what life's all about? You can't gain experience if you don't live and experience life. That's the point. It's all a gamble. Some people win, some win big and most people lose. The sad thing is some people don't strive to become who they want to be v/s who they need to be.

well - true - it's worst if you just sit still and be afraid to make mistakes - that's why i say everyone should get up close and personal with their own inner devil - suppressing and ignoring it will hurt you and others even more so because you'll have no control over what it says and does - and others who do know their own personal devil well, will have a greater control over those who don't

[V4D3R]

mad rep to this thread... if i could give some I would

[LORD NOSE]

just takes 1 wasted night to fuck everything up, start thinking negative.

yup - that's how it be -

I've noticed that staying up late in the night time makes one more susceptible to being foul -

i assume that the human brain needs to rest when the sun goes to rest - and it should wake up when the sun wakes up - but there are allot of things we can all do to better self - our time is spent on maintaining items/property before it's spent on maintaining self -


also, not having the energy to be happy with ones self and the world will cause you to be self destructive -


our intake of sugar plays a big part in this -

[Baby Face Nelson]

i know mine all too well, lately hes been winning and fucking up my life. just takes 1 wasted night to fuck everything up, start thinking negative. desire for love/lust kicking in lately, plotting female schemes, my mind is not clear like it was weeks ago. meditation and acupuncture i foolishly have been putting off.

these things are great by the way. i can definitely feel that eye unless its just making my brain bleed or something

have u had chakra healing bro?

[Baby Face Nelson]

real talk about the sugar..i been on da sugar hard because of my self denial in other areas which aint healthy...i have a huge urge for getting affection from beautiful women it evidently aint doin me good at times but the yearning can be used for a mighty

boost,,DESPITE THAT im a love junkie at heart so i shouldnt try and shun that fact..down to shyness and otha things my exp is virtually non existent

my feelings get real intense..i like it in a way but sometimes dislike though

[Baby Face Nelson]

memories though..they can be so useful

im an idolator in a sense but its the feelings provoked n generated by women that i love so much..they make me wanna bow down n hold them..i wanna hold there stare for dam near forever certain times..that spark

[Hollow Dartz]

it becomes scary because you later realize that the things you wanted 15 to 20 years ago, isn't really what you should have had, and if you were to get what you wanted back then, it most likely would have damaged you -

i'm realizing that wanting less and needing less keeps the weight off of your mind and body -

desires that seem good like love and attention, acception and so forth, are not all that innocent and can lead to your demise - a desire is a desire - it's like an attractive fire that draws you to it - you spend Time getting to it - you get it - and realize that it was a waste of time spent that could have been spent on you locating your problems and solving them.

This is very true. Rep+ for the God. I feel this way at times, slowly coming to this realization. As for the thread starter, you can't keep fighting the last war. Gotta keep your mind moving, this is just apart of the healing process though. Confronting your inner demons may be the best way to deal with them. I've seen examples of people who try to just hide their demons instead of facing them and when shit hit the fan, it's not a good look. I hope you find peace.

[Hollow Dartz]

You're right but isn't this what life's all about? You can't gain experience if you don't live and experience life. That's the point. It's all a gamble. Some people win, some win big and most people lose. The sad thing is some people don't strive to become who they want to be v/s who they need to be.

This is also true, time is the best teacher though, some discover this later than others, some too late.

[LORD NOSE]

generally, people are too tough and afraid to build dialogue with others about what's bothering them in life - communication is shut down and many think that no one would care anyway - we go by what we think is going on and usually assume the worst about others - we trust no one -



Memories - can make you smile or cry - using phantoms of the past to generate energy for you in the present can harm you when you actually revisit these people and places expecting the same feeling or being delusional about what's actually happening in the now time -


we need a new world - not the illuminati new world order type of new world thing, but a world that makes sense and doesn't tolerate the bullshit -

[MASTER PAI MEI]

it becomes scary because you later realize that the things you wanted 15 to 20 years ago, isn't really what you should have had, and if you were to get what you wanted back then, it most likely would have damaged you -

i'm realizing that wanting less and needing less keeps the weight off of your mind and body -

desires that seem good like love and attention, acception and so forth, are not all that innocent and can lead to your demise - a desire is a desire - it's like an attractive fire that draws you to it - you spend Time getting to it - you get it - and realize that it was a waste of time spent that could have been spent on you locating your problems and solving them.

Understood. Don't become a slave to your possessions.