Fuck the Bus (MF Doom-type rhymes)
Waiting for mass transit, heat up, I can't stand it
Next to another student with an odor so rancid
Checkin' out a fly chick's mantle
See her walk away, gets that rear end manhandled
Scrambled up the street, I could catch the train for twice the price
Stood back at my corner, spent my other dough on dice
Precise, fifteen kids fresh outta school
Standin' there with my bus fare, lookin' like a fuckin' fool
Vaudeville idiot, Ren and Stimpyin', lookin' stupid
Horny little pervert next to me struck by cupid
Same dime from before just walked past me
Got me schemin', eyes gleamin' on how to get in that ass, B
Sharp dresser, Charles Xavier head professor
Jeans only shield on my weapon, dick set like Erector
Get it? She brushed straight past me
Stopped and smiled at me, "Adam, you so nasty!"
Hell yeah, I grinned back like the devil
Bout to make the chick sing higher than the Nevills
Ralph Kramden-lookin'-driver rollin' down my way
Got a free woman to take, save 75 cents I would've paid
This here don't cost shit, fuck it if it comes near
Why take the bus down there when I can ride a busdown here?
We walked for a while, my hand in her back pocket
She didn't give it a second thought, I was on my third tryin' to rock it
Had the Rosario Dawson body, Angelina Jolie face
She whispered things in my ear about a time and a place
Here we go, she took my hand and led me into a gas station bathroom
Unbuckled my belt engaged in frotage, too
She led my hand back to her bra strap
It was only right the way I would eventually react
Her back against the wall, we pulsate, gyrate
Here a knock on the door, who the fuck's makin' me cum late?
She said, "Keep goin'," I was with it till the end
Scared by the way this chick made my dick bend
That was it, we said nothin', she got me to leave
Washed her face, rubbed my sperm off with her sleeve
Asked me to kiss her, I told her "Hell no"
She smacked me in the face and said she wasn't a ho
Then she told me her folks left for vacation on the seventh
And I could come through the next day, stay through the eleventh
Damn! Hold your horses like you just clutched my stallion
She laughed at me, said it wasn't big enough for half an orgasm
I was pissed, but pulled up my fly, belt buckled, walked out the door
Right into a buffed-up dude that I hand't seen before
He walked past me, saw some dollars folded in his hand
Goddamn! This bitch was runnin' an after-school program!
I shoulda worn a condom, burned for a whole semester
Thought I knocked her up she was already in her first trimester
Laughed when I heard the news, she had the groupie blues
No plastic, still recycled and reused.
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