<<<%%%6what131 Thread%%%>>>

[6what131]

why put off till tommarow what you can accomplish today/ as you slave your life away im hunting for pray/ im a very fine line in time watching you fade/ im throwing up walls while you walkin lifes maze/ sometimes the hand writing on the wall is forged/ attaining peace inside as the world wars/ they knocking humanity on to a skewed course/ your trusts in frauds, leading us to haulocast/ showing no remorse, of imperialistic thoughts/ reasoning was never in reach/ controlment of oil dosent equal peace/ planting evil seeds and watering them down wit bombs we plant in the streets/ instead of feeding hungry we would rather drop bombs and/ instead of searching for cures we search for bin laden/ america is filled with a million sadams and/ when you here these words you know they were god sent.
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silver surfer review

[Robert]

It was Ok, but was that a freestyle or a sample of yo rhymes? Some good rhymes
"attaining peace inside as the world wars/ they knocking humanity on to a skewed course/ your trusts in frauds, leading us to haulocast/ showing no remorse, of imperialistic thoughts"
thats sick right there.....
more of that and it would be a good verse...good for a first post
peace

[6what131]

throw rocks in the water, watch my brain waves skip/ mental disorder, im on some really sick shit/ make fashion statements, walk around wit slit wrists/ i like being poor, i aint trying to get rich/ therefore im tying to live, im not trying to die/ im just scavenging the plate for crumbs of the pie/ eyeball the sky, head phones beats and rappin/ figured out, life is birth and death overlaping/ you cant stall the hands of time/ fail to realize what my mind applies to rhymes/ bring damage to this planet, human in disguise/ creeping through night, life brutality sight/ arms scared wit teeth marks cause reality bites/ hate life, hammer of god my skulls soften/ rare species, i dont come around often/ burrie me alive i scratch lyrics in my coffin/


it'll take ten barry bonds' doped up to bench press me/ manifest destiny, question me rip off your flesh to bleed/ im dead broke poor, and i aint got no sense in me/ forty dollar jordan, blue jeans and beater tees/ in deep conversation wit my faceless aquantence/ grabbing pencils, stabbing myself to test my patients/ reading books backwards with numerous torn out pages/ write rhymes in accordance wit solar cycles, tides and spaceships/ whats next, no common sense the worlds a mess/ there is no wrong only right cause theres nothing left/ except my breathe to get the message sent and spread to head/ to all the walking dead, god willing ill try my best/ the four season, of my evil thesis brings out genius/ peace seizes, while i create my masterpeices/ but its hard for me to focus, my rehabilitations hopless/ wondering society hoping i dont get noticed.



my boy made a hot beat and this will be my first time spittin a verse on wax. so which is better???????????????
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H2

[Dae Ja Nae]

Very nice for a 1st drop ... I'll be looking for more.

Peace

[Dae Ja Nae]

throw rocks in the water, watch my brain waves skip/ mental disorder, im on some really sick shit/ make fashion statements, walk around wit slit wrists/ i like being poor, i aint trying to get rich/ therefore im tying to live, im not trying to die/ im just scavenging the plate for crumbs of the pie/ eyeball the sky, head phones beats and rappin/ figured out, life is birth and death overlaping/ you cant stall the hands of time/ fail to realize what my mind applies to rhymes/ bring damage to this planet, human in disguise/ creeping through night, life brutality sight/ arms scared wit teeth marks cause reality bites/ hate life, hammer of god my skulls soften/ rare species, i dont come around often/ burrie me alive i scratch lyrics in my coffin/




it'll take ten barry bonds' doped up to bench press me/ manifest destiny, question me rip off your flesh to bleed/ im dead broke poor, and i aint got no sense in me/ forty dollar jordan, blue jeans and beater tees/ in deep conversation wit my faceless aquantence/ grabbing pencils, stabbing myself to test my patients/ reading books backwards with numerous torn out pages/ write rhymes in accordance wit solar cycles, tides and spaceships/ whats next, no common sense the worlds a mess/ there is no wrong only right cause theres nothing left/ except my breathe to get the message sent and spread to head/ to all the walking dead, god willing ill try my best/ the four season, of my evil thesis brings out genius/ peace seizes, while i create my masterpeices/ but its hard for me to focus, my rehabilitations hopless/ wondering society hoping (that) i dont get noticed.



my boy made a hot beat and this will be my first time spittin a verse on wax. so which is better???????????????

I like the content of them both equally ... they each have a their own message, but I must say the 2nd verse goes a little harder that the 1st ... IMO, that is.

Keep at it, and ...


Peace

[GuardianOne]

It had it points though, and it seems you are picking on a nice flow, though you style seems a bit similar to someone, but not exactly it kind of reminds me of someone i know.

Keep posting
Peace

[GuardianOne]

You shouldn't really expect us to tell you which is best, let along you following that. You know your style, and you want people to hear that- what you give and the response varies. Currently most here in the temple don't really know your style unless you provide us with more matterial or information.But you must progress on both your style in verse and on recording.

Peace
PS: They were nice verses although it seemed as though you were busting.

[6what131]

dont know about this verse. the flow is iffy but i like the lyrics.gimme fead back, positive, negative or both.




im liven hidden in this world with a secret alter-ego/ locked in dark rooms, but light is shining through the peep hole/ my two strikes is up, and im starting back at zero/ wit no regrests, i except the life ive messed/ outcast, the holiest of preachers wouldnt bless/ cause my eyes butterfly effect still frames of death/ frightening images, situation you dont except / but all life must end, thats something we must respect/ these visions are more violent then the bloodiest of battles/ writings like murder scenes but double the shock value/ in the the last phases, mapless navagating lifes mazes/ walking footprints over the same landscapes/ corruption spotted, computer chips passed on hand shakes/ country filled with masons, atheist cause religon breeds hatred/ my toxic logic is so beautifuly harmonic/ radical islamics walk wit bombs in they pockets/ most see nonsense, a man beliving in his prophets/ thats the basis of his hatred and why peace will never make it/ living life in two oversized left shoes/ just enough to tip toe to losen the nuse
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volcano digital vaporizer

[MASTER PAI MEI]

in the the last phases, mapless navagating lifes mazes/ walking footprints over the same landscapes/ corruption spotted, computer chips passed on hand shakes/ country filled with masons, atheist cause religon breeds hatred/ my toxic logic is so beautifuly harmonic/ radical islamics walk wit bombs in they pockets/ most see nonsense, a man beliving in his prophets/ thats the basis of his hatred and why peace will never make it

This is tight I like the flow and content

[6what131]

good lookin on the feed back bb.

peace
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CB1

[6what131]

good on the feed back

peace
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buy silver surfer

[GuardianOne]

Quite knowledgable, there was a lot thoughts in this verse, and also the way you related to somethings was proper. Keep posting. But watch for your gramma and speeling, cause the wrong word and it shifts you point when readers read it or hear the verse.It was a good verse.

Peace

[delinquent master]

this is more like a personal view poem, let me know how to fix it, aint no attempts to make it a track or nutn, just like the ideas u know, i love america, but they fuck the world over. feel free to use some shit, these wordz needs to be heard


i was born in a free country, nowadays things aint what they used to be,

but i learned to nevermind the history, pass life carefree, but carefully,

grey that tuesday mornin, we all recall what we was doing,

little did we now from this day on our freedom was ruined ,

they let Bush and his adminisration, rule over their nation,

under the influence of the United Snakes the world was placed in,

and what were facin now is kids being born with chips

their IDentity surgically placed under the skin on their wrists,

how much more ridiculous can our future really get,

this commercialized world we livin in is really shit!!!!

[DigitalScience]

I loved the whole thing even the flow was crazy it had a deep meaning which is what i liked about it.

[6what131]

verse 1-
i write these songs knowing ill never please my critics/the ones who look at image and what color my skin is/def to lyrics, cause i rap without a gimmick/ my one and only mission, expose glitches of the system/ impose my wisdom, for all who choose to listen/ hip hop is suffering, from self inflicted wounds/ a great art forms collidal clash wit doom/ set to rest beside the anchient pyramids in ruin/ albums wit many flaws rated 5 mics in the source/ classic albums wit one or two good songs/ while real classics gather dust in draws/ give em a copy of the rap bible liquid swords/ no longer is it a survival of the fittest/ now a days its money power and bitches/ white kids wearin doo-rags under they fitteds/walking down the block given props "what up ------"/ so vow to war,fight off all invadors/ grab some amunition, pencils and some papers/ so we can save hip hop from its death bed respirator/ exterminate the contaband/
verse 2-
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