Ask me about movies

[brock]

Event Horizon

I was told over and over to watch this film. It's brilliant they said, you gotta see it. Well I did see it. All of twice. And that's more than enough for me. A great start comes crashing down with one of the stupidest, most muddled endings you ever saw. The story is a group of international astronauts go exploring a ship that was sucked into a black hole and returned. And oh yea, it returned with the gate to hell.

What's Good

Lawrence Fishburne. The man carries the film. Actually, I think he's too good for this picture.

The atmosphere. Chilling and claustrophobic. Very uncomfortable. Good score.

What's bad

The Ending. A huge disappointment. It goes from smart sci-fi, to shitty campy horror in minutes.

Jack Noseworthy. Made it to mainstream acting via the MTV generation. Problem is he can't act for shit.

Joely Richardson. What the fuck is Vanessa Redgrave's daughter doing in this?

Overall

They did a great job of cinematography, set design, sound and editing. Some actors are miscast, while some shouldn't have been casted at all. 3/4's of a very good movie.

2 Stars

[11th Chamber]

Blue Streak

[brock]

Blue Streak

If you insist

[TAURO]

Big trouble in little china

[brock]

Blue streak


Martin Lawrence has never been less funny. This contrived mess of a movie tries to ride it's star all the way to payday. It doesn't work. Everybody in the entire movie seems completely retarded, from the cops to the bad guys. The plot is so one track minded, there is absolutely nothing to think about, and even less to smile at. The payoff is so ridiculous, it makes you wonder why they even bothered.

The Good

Dave Chapelle. The only redeeming part of the movie, both the scene at the liquor store and the interrogation scene had me in stitches. GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY!!!

The Bad

The comedy. Mediocre at best.

The Plot. Not much to speak of.

The direction. Did the director know that he could film more than one take?

Luke Wilson. Nobody is more dry. Talk about a guy that can derail a comedy.

Overall

A below average comedy with below average acting, directing, and editing. Nothing redeeming at all.

One star

[brock]

Big trouble in little china

With pleasure. Huge John Carpenter fan.

[11th Chamber]

I appreciate your review. I still love the movie for some reason, but whatever

[brock]

Big Trouble in Little China

The wonderful misadventures of truck driver Jack Burton, played wisecrackingly by a favorite of Carpenter's, Kurt Russell (The Thing, Escape from New York). This movie was blasted by critics, but beloved by fans, mostly because the film has a ton of charm and replay value. Kim Cattrall as reporter Gracie Law plays a wonderful opposite to Russell, their chemistry is more sardonic than sizzling, like Bogart and Hepburn in The African Queen. Do they want to jump on each other or kill each other? It all plays out marvelously as Jack tries to rescue his buddy's girlfriend with green eyes from the mysterious undead David Lo Pan and his ghoulish minions.

The Good

Russell and Cattrall. They never miss a beat all movie.

Dennis Dun. Plays an excellent sidekick to Russell. Very funny translation jokes too.

The soundtrack. Like all his movies, Carpenter also helps score this, and believe me, it fits like a glove.

Dialogue. Loaded with little snaps and comebacks all movie.

Replay value. I never tire of this movie.

The end. Aren't you going to kiss her? Nope. Talk about sticking to the script and character design.

The Bad

Special effects. Laughable by today's standards, nothing makes you really say, wow, how did they film that? The wormlike beast in the sewers is especially fake looking.

Gracie's friend. Should have just been written out of the script, so whiney and annoying.

The ending fight sequence. The midair sword fight is a bit hokey.

Overall

A really enjoyable cult classic from John Carpenter once again. The pace of the movie remains fast and steady throughout, and the characters are well drawn and very funny.

2 stars (either a very good 2 stars or a very weak 3)

[brock]

I appreciate your review. I still love the movie for some reason, but whatever

I'm giving honest reviews here. I understand that movies like this are simply guilty pleasures for most. As you can tell i love Big Trouble in little China, but being completely truthful, it's a two star film.

[BTTR KNG KOOL]

appriciated !

[Suga Duga]

Hitch

[brock]

Hitch

A charismatic love guru (Will Smith) helps an overweight exec (Kevin James) try to land a goddess heir while juggling love problems of his own. Will Smith is great as the suave but clumsy Alex Hitchens. Although his seemingly flawless approach to making love work seems to work for all his clients, he himself can't make anything go right in his courtship of Sara Melas. (Eva Mendez)

What's Good

Smith and Mendez. They shine on screen together, you actually find yourself rooting for it to "work out"


The soundtrack. Great music throughout, I think I even heard some Ghostface in there.

Make-up. When Will's face blows up after his allergic reaction, it looks so cool.

What's Bad

Chick Flick-itis. Follows the exact same formula as every other chick flick in history. Boy and girl meet, fall in love, some turmoil happens, then all of the sudden it works out in the 3rd act.

Kevin James and Amber Valletta. I know they are supposed to be mismatched, but there isn't an ounce of chemistry between them. I never really feel at any point during their courtship that she has the slightest interest in him.

Wrapped up in a bow ending. Too simple, too obvious, too cliche.

Overall

Sure its entertaining, but there really isn't much to think about at all. This movie is proof that Will Smith is a superstar that can carry a movie for 2 hours without much help.

2 Stars

[brock]

whats next?

[11th Chamber]

Michael Clayton

[brock]

Michael Clayton

awesome you brought this up, I saw it 3 times in the last 2 days, I'm on it