LadiesLoveCoolDan Confession

[TSA]

hey wolf, ya you pussy, name 1 hobby you picked up in the lobby.

[Senator C. Palantine]

hey wolf, ya you pussy, name 1 hobby you picked up in the lobby.

Fucking ho's and kicking flows (yes, Im so gully I count that as one hobby)

[TSA]

oh ok, thanks, i can go to class now.

[HANZO]

well thank you for letting us know about your singing habits Dan.

Allah forgives you.

[rainbow]

i like jedi mind tricks. i hope he isn't the one that raps in the cookie monster voice.


backpacker rap is dope, as it is intended to be, but if someones being dope for like, 19 song straight, for the sake of being dope, it gets boring.

haha

I think he is the cookie monster sounding one.

He always says "daddy" in his verses.

[Wu-Tang Forum Internet Poster]

So the other night my girl was out of town visiting her parents. After a rousing afternoon of getting drunk, I found myself back at my home, alone, drunk, and horny, accompanied only by a coffee table full of empty beer bottles and my own desire. So I thought to myself, "Well, Dan, you might as well jack your weiner".

And so i turned off the lamp, lit a candle, and pulled up motherless.com on my laptop for a rousing session of chubby anal videos and self-stimulation.

I found that special fat girl, the tenor of whos crying happened to please me, and so, with my climax fast approaching, i looked for a roll of paper towels or a discarded sleeveless shirt to absorb my soon-to-be cum-geyser.

Alas, nothing was immediately available, and I didn't want to get up and kill the mood. So, using all, or at least a very good portion of my cunning, I reached for an empty beer bottle, pressed my dickhead against the opening, and finished my deed with a contented sigh.

Sated, I then grabbed another beer from the refrigerator, a Stone IPA, nothing fancy, but a solid beer. Usually one to prefer a glass, given my state, I opted for convenience and brought the bottle back to the sofa with me, and luckily, Clint Eastwoods's Unforgiven was on TV, right as Gene Hackman's Little Bill was discussing what made a man dangerous with English Bob's biographer.

So I lit a bowl of dro, drank my beer, and enjoyed my film. A solid, if uneventful evening approached a happy completion. Until, that is, my fortunes suddenly turned.

I reached for the wrong bottle. As soon as hit my tongue, I knew I had committed a dire mistake. The salty mix of the tepid backwash/selfcum mixture will not soon be forgotten.

For the record, I did not swallow. I quickly rushed to the toilet, spat out the semen, and rinsed/sanitized with more beer.

While my shame will not soon subside, I have to say...ehhh, it could have been worse. My cum isn't that bad. So, I suppose, sometimes there is no moral to a story, and I must simply conclude with this open-to-interpretation ending....

Fin.

[GZAjector]

And 9 months later comes the ovary explosion...


Well, at least you did it accidentally, unlike some wutang forum internet posters.

[']

So the other night my girl was out of town visiting her parents. After a rousing afternoon of getting drunk, I found myself back at my home, alone, drunk, and horny, accompanied only by a coffee table full of empty beer bottles and my own desire. So I thought to myself, "Well, Dan, you might as well jack your weiner".

And so i turned off the lamp, lit a candle, and pulled up motherless.com on my laptop for a rousing session of chubby anal videos and self-stimulation.

I found that special fat girl, the tenor of whos crying happened to please me, and so, with my climax fast approaching, i looked for a roll of paper towels or a discarded sleeveless shirt to absorb my soon-to-be cum-geyser.

Alas, nothing was immediately available, and I didn't want to get up and kill the mood. So, using all, or at least a very good portion of my cunning, I reached for an empty beer bottle, pressed my dickhead against the opening, and finished my deed with a contented sigh.

Sated, I then grabbed another beer from the refrigerator, a Stone IPA, nothing fancy, but a solid beer. Usually one to prefer a glass, given my state, I opted for convenience and brought the bottle back to the sofa with me, and luckily, Clint Eastwoods's Unforgiven was on TV, right as Gene Hackman's Little Bill was discussing what made a man dangerous with English Bob's biographer.

So I lit a bowl of dro, drank my beer, and enjoyed my film. A solid, if uneventful evening approached a happy completion. Until, that is, my fortunes suddenly turned.

I reached for the wrong bottle. As soon as hit my tongue, I knew I had committed a dire mistake. The salty mix of the tepid backwash/selfcum mixture will not soon be forgotten.

For the record, I did not swallow. I quickly rushed to the toilet, spat out the semen, and rinsed/sanitized with more beer.

While my shame will not soon subside, I have to say...ehhh, it could have been worse. My cum isn't that bad. So, I suppose, sometimes there is no moral to a story, and I must simply conclude with this open-to-interpretation ending....

Fin.

Jagging off in craft beer bottles..

That's hip hop

That's some check two home-town secret sauce type shit

[JASPER]

motherless.com

Good choice.

[MASTER PAI MEI]

Funny anecdote and life lesson. Always recycle the beer bottles filled with cum.

[Dooch]

Hmmm jizzing in an empty beer bottle....

Note to self: pick up a six pack of Stone IPA

[']

I went from drinking IPA's to sort of hating them. Unless its some sort of limited batch pint bottle. Not sure what provoked my switch to mostly pilners or pale ales.

Guess it has more to do with it being compatible with a whiskey or two.

[Dooch]

While we are confessing.


I'm really sick of having to trim my balls and bush. For a hairy genitaled goombah like myself it can be a real process.

It's not like women are sucking on my pubic bush. The shaft is hairless. I don't think the realize the task or a shorn scrotum.

It's quite an undertaking. A dangerous one, I might add.

Maybe foreign girls are the answer. I'm always seeing these Asians with these huge bushes.

Maybe my wopfro would be some sort of iconic symbol of verility that they would worship.


But the ingrate slut I'm seeing says I need to do a little "man scaping"

It was 4 degrees out yesterday.

The Wopfro stays...

Motherless.com here I cum.

[Dooch]

I went from drinking IPA's to sort of hating them. Unless its some sort of limited batch pint bottle. Not sure what provoked my switch to mostly pilners or pale ales.

Guess it has more to do with it being compatible with a whiskey or two.

I actually don't like IPA hence why I'd jizz in them.

I prefer pale ales or American piss beer. They are more compatible with food and whiskey.

[MASTER PAI MEI]

Pilsners and pale ales are the best.

Olive - Hahahaha too funny man.