^lmfao @ the comments on that story
We do it for the people.
Christ Bearer AKA Shadow Warrior AKA No Wang
The comments on the CNN article are killing me
Joe • 9 hours ago Now he is Andre Johnsonless
Sandy Frank • 9 hours ago I guess he is going to be mad at people leaving the toilet seat up now.
Guy Smiley • 9 hours ago I bet when he pees it's like holding your thumb over the end of a water hose.
Rmando • 9 hours ago He should have put it on a chain and wore it around his neck like Flava Flav
IamAtroll Rmando • 9 hours ago Or put it in the pickle jar.
Tallis Morelle IamAtroll • 9 hours ago Put a ring on it?
Posts by The Hound are signed TH.
Quoting ≠ Agreement.
http://www.eonline.com/news/559406/r...is-or-no-penis
Rapper Who Cut Penis Off: "I'm Alive, Penis or No Penis"
Rapper Andre Johnson made headlines this past April when he cut off his own penis and jumped off the second story of a North Hollywood building.
He survived, and on Sunday, he spoke to E! News exclusively about why he cut off his penis, noting that this is the first time he's spoken truthfully about the incident.
"Yes, I was using drugs that night, but I was in complete control," said the rapper, who also goes by the name of Christ Bearer. "I cut it off because that was the root of all my problems. My solution to the problem was the realization that sex is for mortals, and I am a god...Those kinds of activities got me into trouble, and I came here to be a god."
There were media reports claiming that doctors were able to reattach the Johnson's penis, but he said that isn't the case. "Doctor's weren't able to repair anything," he told E! News. "But, it still gets hard, the little bit that I got. I still got some penis that works."
"It's not the size of the prize, it's the motion of the ocean," he added. "There's no mystery to it, but they couldn't reattach it. A penis is a penis is a penis."
"I wasn't having that much sex up to that point anyways," added Johnson. "My days of reproducing are over. But now I'm a reborn man."
The rapper recalled his first moments waking up in the hospital and thinking, "Whoa, I'm alive. Thank god."
"I didn't want to kill myself," he said. "That was just my response to the demons. They were doing their best to get to me, but being alive solidified my thoughts...I'm alive, penis or no penis."
The rapper "had a psychologist I was seeing after I was released," he said, "but I was quickly okayed after they said I had all my marbles...the lights were on in the attic."
Initially, Johnson remained quiet on the incident. "People perceived me as crazy, so I never wanted to speak wholeheartedly on the matter," he explained. "But now, in retrospect, the truth must be told."
There was some confusion at the time of Johnson's injuries as to his affiliation with Wu-Tang Clan. The group released a statement in April, saying, "What Christbearer did was unfathomable. I feel for his family at this time."
As Johnson told E! News exclusively, though, "Me and RZA came to an understanding. I still write music, but I love comedy and we're going to have a Wu-Tang writing team. I'm going to do stand up along with making music."
Word. Those people are much funnier than us.
Holy fuck. I think that would be worse than having nothing at all. Imagine that. Getting erections but have nothing to jerk off or stick in something."But, it still gets hard, the little bit that I got. I still got some penis that works."
I'm pretty sure not one female on this planet would agree with that. There's a difference between a big cock and small cock, but there's a fucking ENORMOUS difference between a complete cock and an unusable little stump."It's not the size of the prize, it's the motion of the ocean," he added. "There's no mystery to it, but they couldn't reattach it. A penis is a penis is a penis."
LOL @ everything Christ Bearer said in those articles, and the CNN comments.
He has his found his true calling.
Not as a rapper - he sucked at that.
But as a guy that cuts his own penis off, he's very entertaining.
biggest clown in tha history besides dlah
my fav CNN comment: "A Night to Dismember"
lmao
death befalls me
https://linktr.ee/Graveyardshifter
ALBUM OUT NOW! >here https://graveyardshifter.bandcamp.co...piscean-knight
https://g.co/kgs/JcofwaL
https://open.spotify.com/artist/48ZZ...TLSivTAnOqPUBg -spotify
https://soundcloud.com/graveyardshifter
https://www.youtube.com/@graveyard_shifter
https://music.youtube.com/channel/UC...gXn2RceYWhczBw
"Realized sex is for mortals"
He said he wanted to do Stand up comedy? Lmao making fun of himself would be a great way to start.
N.I.
Bookmarks